25 Ways To Get Your Crush’s Attention

How do you get someone you like to
notice you? This is perhaps the oldest
conundrum known to man,
right after
how to get dinosaurs to not notice you.
Here are some ways to get a guy's
attention when he doesn't even know
you exist. (Note: you have to exist or
these will not work.)
1.) Make
eye contact with him from across the
room, and then seductively lick your
lips. If you can't find them, lick
someone else's lips.
2.) Make eye contact with him but
putting your eyeball on his arm.
3.) Stand behind him and tap him on
the shoulder, but then sidestep when
he spins around, and keep doing this
until he is so dizzy that he is in love
with you probably.
4.) Shout out "Hey, future husband!"
and then, if he turns around, he is
obligated to marry you, by the law of
responds-to-shoutsies.
5.) Whistle sharply with your fingers so
that he looks up at you, but be sure
you can actually do this or he'll just see
you going "pthhbth" with your fingers
in your mouth.
6.) Strut around displaying your colorful
plumage in order to show your
desirability as a mate (must be a
peafowl).
7.) Wink at him. If you can't wink, use
your hands to grab one eyelid and wink
manually.
8.) Dress to be noticed by wearing your
finest wizard cloak or vampire
costume.
9.) Pour your heart out in a long,
rambling letter about all of your
feelings and emotions and then put
some perfume in the letter and then
seal the letter with a kiss and then
chicken out and put the letter in the
garbage and go cry in your bed.
10.) Wear an exotic fragrance that
nobody else wears, so that he will
associate this scent only with you (e.g.
Fresh Gasoline or Crayon Taste).
11.) Make some gestures at him, and
then explain that you were telling him
he was cute in sign language, even
though what you actually said was
"wrrlhgbln."
12.) Guys like girls who seem like
they're always having fun, so make
sure he always notices you laughing,
no matter where you are. ("Ha ha ha
this is a hilarious funeral.")
13.) Talk loudly about bras and stuff at
all times, in case he happens to walk
past you and is therefore forced to
think about your underwear.
14.) Walk up to him when he's talking
with friends and clear your throat. If
this doesn't work, start clearing all of
your body parts, one after another. Do
not stop until he is your boyfriend.
15.) Get some super-kawaii anime
surgery and start calling him
"boyfriend-kun;" hopefully he won't
notice that you weren't already dating,
or that you are an anime monster.
16.) Primp when you catch him looking
your way by adjusting your clothes and
fixing your hair (particularly if you
broke it with anime).
17.) Muss up his hair and tell him he is
a good boy like he is a dog. Then lock
eyes with him and say, "I am aware
you are a human."
18.) Walk by his table at lunch, then
immediately turn around and walk past
again, stomping harder and harder
every time until he notices you.
19.) Drop a lot of mysterious hints
around him, e.g. "You're looking a little
under-the-weather" and "If you go out
with me I will give you the antidote."
20.) "Accidentally" run into him
somewhere and act like it's all a big
coincidence. ("Wow, I didn't think I'd
run into you here, in your bedroom,
looming over you while you are
asleep!")
21.) Mention all of the little things
you've noticed about him, such as his
eye color, his blood type, how
surprisingly easy it is to steal
someone's blood, etc.
22.) Snap your fingers. If this doesn't
work, snap his fingers.
23.) People love spontaneity, so he
would probably find it really cute if he
got in his car to drive home and you
leaped up out of the back seat and
shouted "GUESS WHO LOVES YOU??"
24.) One subtle way to flirt is to
position yourself closer to someone,
inside his personal space, so try
moving into his basement without
explanation or permission.
25.) Play hard-to-get, with the police,
because you will have their attention
too at this point.
Source: sparknotes